Oct. 25th, 2011

cedar_grove: (Camel)
From The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have.

Every year, around the scalp of the planet, the caribou run the same path of migration along the edge of the Arctic Circle. They are born with some innate sense that calls them to this path. And every year, along the way, packs of coyote wait to feed on the caribou. And every year, despite the danger, the caribou return and make their way.



For spirits carried in human form, it is a blessing and a curse that we don't always know our calling. Part of our migration is the finding out.

I've talked at length elsewhere about the politics involved with teaching, politics that often gets in the way of what could be seen as a 'calling' to those in the profession, devoted to the education and welfare of children.

I mention it today once again, because today at work, I was going from class to class to class, covering for the teachers while they went to their pupil progress meetings. For those not in teaching, this is where teachers go and talk to the Headteacher and Senior leadership team about the progress of the children in their class, and to justify and explain why little Johnny R, who lives with a lone parent, is often left alone because his parent is out working three jobs to bring in just enough money to pay the rent, comes to school hungry because a fourth job is out of the question so of course they can't eat is still unable to write at level 3 and is chronically disaffected at school, while his peer, little Johnny S, who lives with both parents, who have good jobs and can work flexible hours, spent plenty of quality time with their son, and extend his hobbies and quality of life when and where possible, has managed to achieve level 5 in writing and is always keen to come to school, (Stereotypes, and deliberately extreme – I'm making a point here… stay with me)…

Anyway… I got home, and had some kind of discussion with Dad, about kids, and schools and teachers – and kids called Liam who always seem to be on the naughty end of the spectrum… and from there we got to talking about Facebook, somehow, ah, I remember – he asked me if I saw what Callum had posted the other night, and I told Dad that no, I hadn't, because I'd had to decline friending Callum, (and also the requests of many ex-pupils) because it wasn't professionally appropriate to be Facebook friends with people who may also be friends of children I could very well end up teaching. I bemoaned the fact that teachers had to be so damn careful – and said that the days when teachers were known and respected community members were long gone… and Dad said that no… long gone were the days when teachers were allowed to be mentors for kids, like they're supposed to be – helping them to grow and develop as responsible members of society.

Maybe when /that/ was lost was when teaching truly became the scapegoat profession, and not the calling that those of us that feel its pull hold hope in our hearts that it will be once more.
cedar_grove: (Books)
From The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have.

To stand up and be worn
to something deeper
is a pledge that living
forces us to keep.



-Sit quietly and bring to mind a time when you stood up to something you had to face.
-Breathe deeply, and consider in what way the experience wore you down.
-Center yourself, and name, if you can, how this standing and wearing down changed you.

I've had this book to review, for a site that reviews 'romance' novels pre-release and at the time of release. I've been putting it off and putting it off and putting it off because… well, quite frankly I had serious trouble with the book, though I suspect that mostly is because I'm a bit of a snob on the quiet, more so than I thought I was. Anyway, when I got home from work today, I finally bit the bullet and wrote the review… managing to pull enough positives out of the book, (and the experience of writing the review), to make it sound not quite so dire, because I'm sure there are others out there that will enjoy the book where I really did not. I tried to be objective.

While the review was outstanding, it really started to get to me. I wanted to read other things that I want to read… and there are other books that I need to read, but this blessed review, hanging over me like the proverbial Sword of Damocles made me reluctant to read anything at all… and that was starting to frustrate me.

Now, having stood up to meeting this responsibility of reviewing the book (I had volunteered to do so), now that it's done I'm practically skipping round the room wondering which book to pick up next. No… actually that's not true, I know exactly which book I'm picking up next – Destiny anyone? However, it has also sharpened the resolve in me that… no matter what, if the books I have to review do not grab me within the first 100 pages… I'm reviewing on the strength (or weakness) of those pages, and moving on… though… having spoken to Mir last night, I might have to relax that rule where the Typhon Pact books are concerned. :P
cedar_grove: (Butterfly)
From The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have.

If you tell me you already understand, I feel a little pessimistic. If you say you do not understand, I feel more optimistic.
--Thich Nhat Hanh



Having an honest friend-one before whom you can dump all your heart's pockets and still feel that you are worth something is a form of wealth that will buy you nothing but will give you everything. And mysteriously and rightly, to find such a friend, we must be such a friend.

Yesterday I misjudged a situation, someone's words badly. No one was hurt except me… and that was all my own doing, but it brings home the above very clearly.

Today I find myself trying to comfort two good friends who are both facing difficult times, emotionally. I have been where one is now, and could only open up and share with her all that was in my heart at the time I was in such a position, in such a place, for while affirming for her what she already knew she had to do, it was only through giving her that piece of myself that I think I could have helped. To the other I could only say I am here.

These three people, spoken of here, are my 'honest-friends' my 'best' friends whom I love very dearly and to whom I can, (and I'm sure have) empty my heart's pockets… it's just me that is the cowardly one who puts in her hand to grab the fluff at the bottom and trembles with 'what if she sees this?' And that's just plain foolish.

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