Body Language

[cedar_grove]

From The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have.

Before we blink,
we know each other.

We speak before we speak, with eyes and lips, in how we tip our heads, in how we lean like trees tired of waiting for the sun. we tell our whole story before we even open our mouths. Yet we frequently pretend that nothing is conveyed. We pretend we are strangers and deny what we learn before words.

I'm often told that I'm 'furious' when I'm not, that I'm stomping around and huffy, when I honestly don't believe I am, and of course that annoys me to be told that, and then it becomes true.

I appreciate the idea of body language, and everything, I don't deny that it exists and that it often speaks of more than our actualy words do, and I don't deny that there are and have been times when, even with the best will in the world to want to I've been unable to hide the way I feel because of that body language, which of course, makes it a right royal pain in the a$$.

It gets to the point sometimes when I am terribly afraid to get up and move, to get something, or fetch something to do because I know that in doing so, I will be allowing my disappointment to show - I will be displaying my emotion at a time I want to be supportive of someone else's needs, and so I stay still and then get agitated and the whole thing becomes a viscious circle. If I've promise to weigh the words I speak, should that not include the ones my body speaks for me?

I do get disappointed sometimes, and I do find it hard to hide that disappointment - it's not something I deal well with, and I know that, I confess that for all the world to see, but what I actually get annoyed about is feeling guilty for wanting to get up and get something to do, and not feeling able to because of the reasons I mentioned above.

On the completely other hand, there are times when I wish my body language would show in a better way just how I'm feeling. There are some times when I'm doing things with Mir and enjoying them tremendously, having a great time, but I end up making Mir feel like that's not the case because I'm not showing it. I don't want to end up triggering anyone's insecurities either because of the words my body is speaking, or the ones it's not speaking when it should be... and I don't know how to get aroud that - I wish I did.

Comments

[vegawriters.livejournal.com]

You are only responsible for how you react, not how others react to situations. Remember that a lot of times, body language is not just US but how others are projecting their feelings onto us. I'm not saying to be inconsiderate, of course, but all you can do is what you need to do. Otherwise, you are not in fact taking control of yourself but allowing others to control.