What's Love Got To Do With It...?

My lover's skin glows like the finest marble,
and I burn to touch it, I burn with the teasing
dance of her glances, I am no fire, I am aflame,
I cannot think of anything but love.

Venus has abandoned her island shrine at Cypress
to live within my heart. The goddess will hear nothing
but songs of love now, she will endure no music to stir
the blood toward war, adventure, or anything but love.

Friends, build a green altar right here, and lay me down
upon it. Place sacred branches all around my body,
and bowls of wine, and wands of incense. I am already
a victim of love, a sacrifice to Venus. Now let her hear
my plea!

--Horace

the love of parents for children, teachers for students, friends for each other - these relationships are not just human connections. They participate in and reflect the great network of connectedness that is our magnificent universe.

When is love most on our minds? This question came to the forefront of my thoughts during the meditation on today's text and I wondered why. Is love most on our minds when we are together with those we love (those many different loving relationships as mentioned above); when we are apart; when we feel, or do not feel the love? Why has it been so strong in my thoughts and feelings and awareness, especially of late? The only answer I can come to is that just lately, I haven't been feeling the love.

Let me clarrify that right away, because talking about the love of the people around me - students and colleagues - and not of those further away from me, Mir and my parents, whose love sustains me... keeps me whole, (although that said, Mum in her usual blunt way told me yesterday to basically 'suck it up' when I expressed that I had had a bad day).

Of course, as in anything there are a few exceptions to this, the few student who always make me feel valued, respected and loved - colleagues who do the same... even the words of a neighbor unexpectedly offering, 'SabaH al Xeer' (Good morning) as I was coming out of the apartment block - though I don't know why that should have added to my feeling grounded, loved and respected - valued as a person, since I have no real relationship with this person in any sense of the word. He's a neighbor, sure, by virtue of living in the same apartment block - but I don't know him from Adam.

It must all then, be in that connection to the Universe, feeling valued makes us feel connected, makes us feel sacred; divine?

Knowing how low I personally feel when I don't have that kind of 'love' coming into my life, and knowing and wanting to live by giving what you receive - (though I confess to being bad at that) - I try to make sure I'm there for people, accessible to people, (without getting pulled into their personal dramas - which is admittedly hard sometimes), to be a sounding board, so that people feel valued and listened to - sothat people feel loved.

I felt loved today when some of my children's parents asked about the rats. I regularly talk to the children about them (especially Zenny, because we wrote about him in a story, but the others too), and they are obviously going home and talking to their parents about our pet rats. So when the parents came in for parent day today, some of them asked. It made me feel good - like they cared. That's one thing that is very different over here from over in the UK. The parents are very much more involved - maybe because they're paying (but that's being a bit cynical), but the communication between parents and teachers gets to feel more like a personal relationship after a while... like the way you see teachers were a part of the family way back in the day. I like that. But maybe that's just another reflection of my need to be needed and loved and valued.

New Day

It is a miracle:
in the heavens is the sun,
in her chamber the sun,
in the heavens the moon,
in her chamber the moon.
In the heavens the stars,
in their chambers the stars,
in the heavens the dawn,
in her chamber the dawn,
and all the beauty beneath the skies.

--Fifteenth century Russian folksong

Do not wait to notice her presence. Begin with the dawn, and notice her power throughout this day - this precious, ordinary and amazing day.

I have a routine on the weekdays... one that begins with a morning Orison... a simple statement of welcoming in the day - the powers and the Universe. At 6:15am it's usually still dark enough to need a light to see in order to do anything of note, but light enough to not be black as pitch... and by the time I leave the house, though not full daylight, the day has begun in earnest. Hail to these, Bright Sun, King of the Morning. Hail to these all light and life - Hail glorious Universe of which I am but a small but burning spark. Hail to thee new day. It's not always words - though some mornings I do feel the need to speak the words aloud - those, or some variation on them. Some mornings it is just a thought - a feeling... or a moment of standing in the room as the light grows. Just so long as it is some recognition of 'Beginning' a new day.

I see the goddess in the day, certainly, but for me the sun is a masculine energy - its light and heat a male thing. I suppose that's the way I've always felt it, and certainly the way I was 'taught' as a Wiccan. North (Earth), and South (Sun/Fire) as male influences... East (Air) and West (Water/moon) Female. Just one of those things I suppose, so - it's strange to me to be considering the sun as feminine... as goddess and not god. A deviation, but in all things it always helps to have a fresh perspective.

A fresh perspective was definitely what I needed in respect of the way I was feeling about a situation at work. I was feeling trapped, with no place to go to address the problem. Talking to Mir last night, she helped me more than she can imagine by suggesting a simple solution or way forward. The suggestion empowered me in a situation where I was feeling powerless, and as such gave me the energy to face the new day as I went in to work. Where I had been miserable and grumpy I was able to remain calm, and to enjoy my time with the children. Even managed a meeting with the person that has been causing the upset without feeling defensive. It was good. Mir always manages to help me like this. What can I say - My Guy!

She helps me in other ways too - new day, new perspective... and old ones too, reminders, like the sunset at the end of the day that are a reflection of all that was the sunrise, like the day's memory and promise all rolled into one. Through her suggesting I should sign up for the readathing, I have remember how much I love reading, and even though today is the last day of the readathing - I will, for myself, make sure I read for at least one, maybe 2 hours each day. Perhaps not all in one chunk, but at least remembering to pick up the kindle and read every opportunity I get. It is one part of me that has been missing, and finding it again is a great comfort to me. The miracle of those few, quite moments spent with just me and my guided imagination.