Grant, O' Goddess, Thy Protection... and In Protection - Strength...

I bend my head to you, Durga,
I bend my knee. I pray:

Grant me protection!

Your eyes are like leaves on dark water.
Your eyes are like dark leaves of lotus.

Grant me protection!

Your arms are a shelter of truth.
You shelter us with truth itself.

Shelter me in your arms!

--Indian Mahabharata

Remaining true to ourselves is not easy. It is a constant battle. Durga remainds us to armor ourselves against all who would tempt us to forget our inner truth.

I find it interesting that the author of the book - the guide of these reflections, if you like to put it that way - would choose such a combative Goddess in whom to place the trust, direct the supplication for the protection and maintenance of self; the submersion in ones own inner truth.

I spent much of the day, off and on, contemplating the issue - ruminating on it, and in quiet moments sinking into meditation about it. Why Durga - why such fierceness? Sure, I associate with the Morrighan, quite a lot at times - the Celtic Goddess of Battle and of Death - and yes, it's in a protective kind of way, but more protective in a traditional sense, when working ritual and 'spells' (and boy do I ever wish there were another way of putting that, because it just doesn't really fit thanks to pop culture). I've never really thought of Morrighan as being protective for the truth of my inner self - that is for me and my guides to defend; to adhere to.

And in that regard, I must return to the woods and our woodland brothers and sisters, since that is where my thoughts and meditations led me.

I'm put in mind of two trees (and maybe it's a bit of a cliche here, but it's also true) - the oak and the willow. The oak, though strong is inflexible... in a storm standing in the path of the wind and weather and often falling to it. The Willow is strong in a flexible kind of way. In the face of the storms she bends, allowing the wind and weather to pass over her before returning to her true self. Should we each then stand strong and inflexible as the oak, or as the willow, bend in the storms while remaining ourselves... and where does my cedar come in? Cedar is an aromatic wood, strong and solid and stable - but like the oak inflexible...but his spreading leaves provide shade, protection from heat and the scorching rays of the sun, providing a place where our reflections can turn to the innermost shadows of ourselves... those dark spaces we love to avoid looking into, but which are so often the source of the deepest self truths, and also those things about ourselves which we want to hide; refuse to own and thereby become tempted from the path of being true to our inner self - I know that's been the case with me in the past. I hold my hand up to that.

Perhaps there is a time to be as each tree, each in its own situation, each as it best fits the need at the time. If that is truly the case, then I begin the year sitting beneath the cedar, contemplating the shadows, peering deep into the darkest recesses of self to root out all those things I have been hiding from all this time - ready to confront the those that could be seen as negative, even as I embrace them, love them as a part of me, and gentle them to become a part of myself. Perhaps it's that attitude that has me so uncomfortable with the notion of Durga to protect our innermost self... but then, is there not a line in that prayer that asks for 'shelter'?


(From Goddess Companion: Daily Meditations on the Goddess.)