The Small Stuff
Feb. 21st, 2011 06:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cedar_groveFrom The Book of Awakening: Having the Life You Want by Being Present to the Life You Have.
In everyday terms, this means that each time we experience a change in reality as we know it, we must choose whether to declare or hide what we know to be true. At such moments, we either need to bring the way we have been living into accord with that shift of reality, or we need to resist the change. Thus, in daily ways, whether we live in our True or False Self depends on our willingness to stay real. and so, over time, staying real becomes the work of keeping our actions in the world connected to the truth of our inner being, allowing our True Self to see the light of day.
I experience this daily.
In lesser or greater ways, to smaller or greater degrees. One of the ways in which it happens, on a personal level is through contradictions, to which I give in, for the sake of peace and and avoiding a dispute or argument. It's only little things, like when I'm sure I've said something, but I'm told I didn't. Instead of sticking to my guns I give in. It's small stuff, don't sweat the small stuff, but still... it leaves me feeling invalidated.
In a wider sense, I'm feeling this, and have been feeling it in a big way for a long time, because of my inability to be my self, and be true to myself in a lot of way. Much of that is out of my control, but that doesn't mean it makes it any less of a burden to carry. It doesn't make it any less damaging... and there's also little I can do, which makes it also a very frustrating shadow to be living under.
So maybe... because I can't chance the big stuff, I have to live with trying to be honest over the small stuff... and I do, and I will.
How can one be born again?
-Nicodemus to Jesus
In everyday terms, this means that each time we experience a change in reality as we know it, we must choose whether to declare or hide what we know to be true. At such moments, we either need to bring the way we have been living into accord with that shift of reality, or we need to resist the change. Thus, in daily ways, whether we live in our True or False Self depends on our willingness to stay real. and so, over time, staying real becomes the work of keeping our actions in the world connected to the truth of our inner being, allowing our True Self to see the light of day.
I experience this daily.
In lesser or greater ways, to smaller or greater degrees. One of the ways in which it happens, on a personal level is through contradictions, to which I give in, for the sake of peace and and avoiding a dispute or argument. It's only little things, like when I'm sure I've said something, but I'm told I didn't. Instead of sticking to my guns I give in. It's small stuff, don't sweat the small stuff, but still... it leaves me feeling invalidated.
In a wider sense, I'm feeling this, and have been feeling it in a big way for a long time, because of my inability to be my self, and be true to myself in a lot of way. Much of that is out of my control, but that doesn't mean it makes it any less of a burden to carry. It doesn't make it any less damaging... and there's also little I can do, which makes it also a very frustrating shadow to be living under.
So maybe... because I can't chance the big stuff, I have to live with trying to be honest over the small stuff... and I do, and I will.
