Calming Maeve

[cedar_grove]

She is a woman whose yellow hair falls down
in thick twisted braids and whose green-irised eyes
are of uncommon beauty and whose cheeks
when flushed resemble the rosy foxglove.
Snow is never as white as her teeth, nor
the leather of Parthia as red as her full lips.
When high queens see her, they ache with envy
at those red lips opening over those white teeth.
They ache to see such beauty, such perfection.

--Maeve, described in the Tain bo Cuailnge

Honoring our own efforts, and demanding that others acknowledge them as well, should be part of our daily discipline.

Here is a conundrum. In the quotation as it's given above, we're told that - as the Goddess Maeve - we too should be prepared to stand up for what we're done and also demand that those around us do also. Folks say that you'll never get ahead if you don't 'blow your own trumpet (horn)' as it were, but at the same time, people seem to value humility - I guess because it's less threatening maybe? So how do we marry the two?

It's something I've never been very good at. Selling myself, blowing my own trumpet, however you want to put it, (though I seem to do pretty well on interview, which is confusing really). I find it uncomfortable and always have, preferring by far to be humble and quiet about things. I wonder if that's a British thing or a me thing - because many of the people I know that are not British don't seem to have that problem. They are able to speak of their achievements, it seems, easiy in order to allow others to comment on their ability or prowess.

Yet as I think more on the words of the quote, and of how I feel in trying to self-promote my achievements (yes, sometimes even to myself), I'm put in mind of the line from The Charge of the Goddess in which we are reminded:

Let my worship be within the heart that rejoyces
for behold, all acts of love and pleasure are my rituals.
Therefore, let there be beauty and strength,
power and compassion, honor and humility,
mirth and reverence within you.*

Which urges us for balance in all things. Honour and humility. Can we be humbled by our own knowledge of all that we have achieved, all that we can do, and does such recognition bring us closer to an aspect of the goddess, perhaps different from the persona - forceful and strong as she is - of Maeve, as is the quoted in the text? If so, what goddess - what aspect might she be?

None of this touches on the aspect of others' respect for an individual though... others respect of me, and my achievements. Do I even want that respect, that recognition? Well, I mean yes, sure it's good to be appreciated for what you've done. It's a good boost to your self esteem when someone tells you that you've done a good job with something. To feel validated in what you do is also a good feeling.

To accept that recognition with good grace is not always easy, and perhaps that is where the humility comes in, but accepting the recognition of another in some way honours them in return. You become a mirror of each other, a reflection of the divine like moonlight on water - and in such a way, perhaps, is Maeve's angry heart made calm.

(*Written by Doreen Valiente)